Third-gender Artist Model
22 years experience as a life drawing artist's model
50 years as a submissive sissy femboy
I identify as a:
Pre-Op homosexual transsexual
berdache/third-gender type
100% female-roled receptive male
Preferential "Class X" submissive 100% female-roled receptive zoosexual from 1970-2000
(I became celibate as a zoosexual in 2000)
Former female-roled
receptive zoosexual
1970 to 2000
From 1970 to 2000, I consider my core identity to be a submissive Preferential female-roled receptive zoosexual for large intact male dogs and intact male equines.
Psychologically I have a "Pre-Op" Male to Female Homosexual Transexual Identity
The reason I refer to myself as "third-gender" is because I am physically a male, yet psychologically I feel like a female.
I've been a owned-collared "free Use" submissive, 100% female-roled femboy
since 1975
I got caged in 1999, I am 100% psychologically feminized/emasculated
"In 2000 I started serving only human males sexual"
("I only model wearing a cage")
It is intented to figure my own self out better, why I am who I am
though this is the exhibitionistic
element for me
because I am a
"exhibitionist"
I truly love modeling and modeling for artist has no erotic element for me.
My questions I've struggled with all my life,
why do I need treated sexually like a female.
"And wish to be Female"
Many questions
The content is intended for educational, research and journaling purposes Much of the content is in Scenario Form
thus whether fact or fiction, is by interpretation.
If only;
"How things could of turned out dilemma"
"Like a thought experiment of sorts"
or
" Some aspects based on fact "
" A hodgepodge script "
"Thought experiment"
My Web Journal
"Like an Actor preparing for a script in order to be convincing"
"A Study and Outline for my Novels;
fiction novel: "The Jensen Group"
and
"No One needs to be an another more then the Transsexual, No One needs another more then the Exhibitionist"
(a life as a submissive female-roled receptive zoosexual)
" As much as Life Drawing can express Reality, it can express Fantasy "
NSFW
contains nudity and sexual content
A journey of "Living vicariously in a imagined scenario"
All videos, photos, gifs
are for illustrative purposes
established
FEBRUARY 19th, 2020
Contact at;
note: most of the imagery on my site is for illustrative purposes to illustrate how I became completely psychologically feminized/emasculated and how my identity revolves around the need to be female-roled both sexually and non-sexually.
Forever editing the site
Trauma-based Hypersexuality
A insatiable desire to be "bred"
My parents Divorce
Becoming a Femboy
My oldest clear memories are of around 6 years of age, at which time my Mom and Dad suddenly got a divorce, this was very traumatic, in that my life seemed turned upside down, Dad was gone, suddenly one night a new man show up at the front door, I had answered the door beause mom was doing something. The man said to me, "you must be Michael, here I bought you matchbook car, I figured a young guy like you would like it " as he handed it to me, at first I didn't take it, I was freaked out, then Mom can up behind me and pulled me aside and let the guy in as she took the car from him and asked me to go get ready for bed.
Next thing I remember was being awaken, as I peeked out from my bed covers here is this man walking through my bedroom nude, my eyes focus on his large penis as he walks through my room on into Mom bedroom.
I am fully awake now as I lay in darkness, soon giggling comes from inside Mom's room, I had two doors in my bedroom, one leads out to the hallway and opens next to the only bathroom in our small house, the other door opens directly into Mom's bedroom. I look towards Mom's door and can see a faint light coming through the crack in door, the man didn't pull the door complete shut. I can't remember if I got up with the intent to close the door or what, yet curiosity the best of me so I looked in through the crack in the slightly open door, because they had a bed side lamp on, I could clearly see the both of them on the bed. Mom was laying along the man her body half way down beside him and Mom was taking the man's big stiff penis into her mouth, I watched her suck and lick it a short while, then she lift up straddled his body and with one of hands Mom guided the man's penis up into her body and then started rocking back and forth on as she gasped and moaned. My mind seemed to be in a trance, all I could do was stare and watch what taking place.
This becomes what seemed like a night routine, I'd go to bed at 9pm, and be woked up at about 10:30 pm by Mom or the Man walking through my room nude, or from moaning, giggling noises from Mom's room, they seldom pulled the door shut, at that point I wouldn't be able to sleep, so I go sit on the floor and watch them have sex.
I don't remember how long this went on, at least several months because I knew kindergarden was soon to be out for the summer, I just got my training wheels of my bike, I remember it had gotten really warm because one day I was playing in the front yard when Mom walks out on the drive-way pushing her bike, and because I had gotten a new bike because she had told me that was to be birthday present, my birthday being June 17th.
Anyway Mom tells me to get on her bike as she holds it upright, I could barely touch the pedals, yet she insisted that she push me up and down the street, as I pedaled it, I knew even then this was a disaster waiting to happen, yet she just was sure I could ride it.
Our street which was Elm st. ran north-south, to the south it teed off into Clay st. there were no stop signs as this was a low traffic neighbor hood no one drove more the 15 mph.
I remember well, just as we passed our house and headed south, Mom still pushing me, yet she sudden gave me a big shove and said, "Go Michael, you got it now, I weaving back and forth, yet I did have it, in about 20 yards I was steady and about 30 yards to go before I got to Clay street, I started looking for traffic when I heard the fire chief's car siren coming from my right, as I looked he was coming east down Clay st. he and I were on a collision course, I knew the bike had brakes, yet to put them on I had to be able to put the weight of my foot on pedal, and suddenly I realized my legs were no long enough because Mom's bike was a boy's bike.
Next thing I remember was slamming into front left fender the fire chief's red car as it sped in front of me, flying across the windshield of the car.
Next thing I knew I was laying next to the big tree that was right there next the road looking up at the fire chief who was on his knees yelling. "wake up Michael".
After a few minutes, maybe 5, I was able to stand up, my fore head had a big cut, which the fire chief got bandaged up first before trying to stand me up.
That was that, yet my life was as usual in chaos, and fully of uncertainty, my friend Kevin who was 12 years old, lived two houses down to the north on Elm st, so across the street, I been bugging him for as long as I could remember, always going over seeing what he was doing type behavior, he seemed to like me and there were no other guys his age in the neighborhood, at least not within a few blocks.
June 17th arrives, Mom got me a nice new purple sting-ray, just the one I told her I liked when we were shopping at O.T. Johnsons
Of course, the first person I had to show my new bike was Kevin, so I quickly got on it and rode it over to his house, he was out in the garage working on the lawn mower and was soon going to mow their yard, he'd been mowing our yard as well since dad moved out.
I begged him to go for a short ride with me, so we rode around the block once, then I rode over to Meredith's house, a friend who was in the same grade as me, but his Birthday was April 6th, so a few months older, yet he seemed a lot more mature than me, so I somewhat followed his lead in all things.
Meredith was home, as he'd been at my little birthday party, and he'd just walked home and told me come over and we go for a bike ride, so we rode around the neighborhood for quite a while, I asked Meredith if I could suck his cock, he told me we could tomorrow in the woods next to the school yard, but he had to get back home.
When I arrived back home, Kevin was just finishing mowing our yard, and Mom was out talking to him and paying him, I got of my bike and walked over to them Mom said, "Kevin would you mind hanging out with Michael a couple hours, I'm going to run a few errands".
To my delight Kevin said yes, by this time it was clear in my mind that I vicariously wanted to be like mom, I'd been having obsessive thoughts of wondering what it would be like to suck Mom's boyfriends cock, I looked forward to seeing him nude, and watch his big penis sway about as he would sneak through my bedroom, I prayed they wouldn't close the door to Mom's room completely so I could get up and watch as they had sex.
Now my thoughts were focused on asking Kevin and Meredith if I could suck their cocks, Meredith was going let me tomorrow, as soon as Mom left I asked Kevin if we could ride down to the creek then walk to the beaver pond, he said sure so we went to his house, he pushed the mower, as I slowly rode my bike around in circles somewhat.
Once Kevin had the mower put in its place, he and I headed south toward the creek which was about a 10-minute bike ride at a quick pace, we hid the bikes in the big culvert that went under the road which the creek ran through, was much water running in the creek.
We then headed down stream toward the beaver pond, which was another 5 minutes.
As we were close enough to see the pond, Kevin said, "it so hot, let's see if the water it warm enough to get in, so once we reached the pond, we both dipped our hands in the water, we agreed it was warm enough so we stripped all our clothes off and waded in, it felt great, so we started splashing each other, just goofing off have fun then after 15 minutes or so Kevin climbed out of the water and sat down on a large fallen log at the edge of the pond. As I watched Kevin emerge out of the water couldn't take my eyes off Kevin's large man size cock hanging between his legs as I swam over to be by him, I climbed out. It was like I was under a spell, in a trance, I wanted to feel his penis in my mouth, it was though it was meant for me and I had to have it, swam up in front of him and simple asked him if I could suck his cock, he said, his was somewhat shocked, then I meekly said, I know it is right for me, I want so much to be like a girlfriend to you, Kevin said, "ok", before he could say another word I was climbing out of the water, then instantly down on my knees in front of him, then so, so eagerly taking his cock in my mouth, omg!, a moment etched in mind forever, as I wrapped my lips around the head of his penis, I felt so good to finally have his penis in my mouth, like my ultimate dream coming true I remember. Kevin was so wonderful and kind, so I was lucky to have him for my first experience, he told me what felt good as I licked and sucked, told me to watch my teeth so I didn't cause him discomfort, then when he was ready to ejaculate he told me to hold his cock head just a in front of my open mouth so he could watch as his semen shot into my mouth, yet mainly so not to gag me with the semen shooting into mouth.
Seeing Kevin in such pleasure, hearing him moan, as he ejaculated, then tasting his semen in my mouth was beyond wonderful to me, like I'd found my true purpose in life at that moment.
My true role and identity
is being a female-roled receptive sex partner for
large intact male dogs, jack donkeys and stallions