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Objectified Sexually

I want Men to use me for sex as they wish

I Want to be

I want Women to see me being feminized sexually by men 

I want Women to use me for sex in a feminizing way

Use me for sex in a feminizing way , I am a Sissy Slutboy

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I crave sexual attention

I've always wanted to be sexually objectified by guys, I like guys to tell me that I am their sissy-slut, femboy slut etc. and I want to perform for them sexually in that manner.

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Collared free-use submissive femboy

"Objectifying" myself sexually in front of others

While in the presence of others,

As a "free-use submissive" type sissyboy, I love to be told!,  it turns me on intensely to have a boyfriend pull his cock out, then he tells me to get on my knees and suck it til he cums in my mouth.

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"The following scenario is how I think!"

"Meeting Elle for the first time"

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(Ada is my long-time best friend)

 

 

Michael and Aunt Becky are sitting at kitchen table when Ada calls, 

Michael answers phone,

Ada says, "hi Michael, what you doing?".

Michael, "Aunt Becky and I just finished having breakfast she just left to take a shower, we were just going over the plans for the new Quonset house to be built at estates 3, how is the seminar going up there?".

Ada replies, " it a great seminar, but I need to tell you that I met a guy here, he is about our age, he is a horse trainer similar to Eric in what he do for a living, don't be mad, but he fucked me today at the seminar site in his van twice, he is here with me now and we just got done fucking again, I told him I want him to come down and join the group".

Michael replies, "you must really like him then, what is his thoughts on joining the group?".

Ada replies, "he is pretty certain that he is going to, I told him that your my bed partner, that your a femboy and that if he does he has to fuck you as well, he has to let you suck his cock, he says he will".

Michael, "what is his name?".

Ada, "his name is Tom".


Michael, "does Eric think it would work out having Tom as a trainer here at the Jensen group?".

Ada, "yeah he does, I've told Tom how the group works as far as being a Polyamory type structure,  Eric and Tom just finished double teaming me about 15 minutes ago, and believe me they fucked me silly, Tom had a great time, he isn't has hung as Eric, yet Tom has a nice big fat 8 inch cock and knows how to use it, Tom going sleep with me tonight and likely tomorrow night, Eric and I both know we will have to be in quarantine for a month now, as will Tom, but we feel it is worth it to get Tom to join the group".

Michael, "so Tom is 18 years old, was he raised around horses?".

​

Ada, "yep, he lives in Wyoming, yet he is really here visiting his older brother who lives here in the Chicago area, he likes the idea of living closer to his brother if he joins our group, Michael I think I'm in love with him, he feels the same, I even told him he could get me pregnant if he wants to". 

Michael, "wow, you must be crazy about him then, I'm happy for you, just do what you feel is right, you've got my full support, maybe Tom could run and get a STD test there, is Tom planning on coming home with you and Eric".

Ada, "yes, that is the plan".

Michael, "have you told Tom that your a Preferential receptive zoosexual for dogs and equines?.

Ada, " yes, I had to if he and I are going to have a long term relationship, I told him what you and I do routinely every day as far as getting bred by all the dogs, sucking the the stallion's cocks, don't tell Aunt Becky, but Tom has ejaculated in my pussy three times already, I want to have his baby, he says he is fine with me being a Preferential zoosexual, he just wants to live with me, I did tell him you and I would have to talk about me becoming Tom's full-time bed partner, yet you and I still have continue being together as we do daily seeing the dogs and stallions just as we have always done, I can't change that part of my life".

Michael, "Can I tell Aunt Becky that Tom ejaculated in your pussy and you want to have his baby?

Ada, "yes, please tell her, I'm a coward to" 

Michael, "ok I will, we will work it all out, I think you should become his full-time bed partner, I'm a sissy cuckold type any how, so it turns me on that Tom is fucking you, and you feel good about telling me, so thanks so much, I know I love you, and I know you love me, so no worries please, just have nice time and get back here with Tom, we will go from there".

Ada, "thanks so much for saying what you've just said, I was worried about hurting your feeling so badly, I just have never met a guy like Tom, where it is like love at first site, which it was, he and I were sitting in the stands together for maybe a hour talking, then we raced to his van fucked like crazy, came back to seminar, after another hour we were back in the van fucking again, he fucked me three times during the seminar, then he and Eric double teamed me tonight".

Michael, "nice, I know it turns me on, I can only imagine how horny you and Tom must be".

Ada, "yeah, I'm burning up in heat for sure, Tom can fuck me and cum in my pussy all he wants!".

Michael, "getting pregnant will also keep your tits lactating good".

Ada, "yeah, I love breast feeding, I told Tom that I'd breast feed the puppies, he even sucked some milk from my tits and loved it".

Michael, "it will be nice having you and Tom's baby in Aunt Becky's house, and the baby will get plenty attention from the young guys and girls you know that, built in baby-sitters"

Ada, "yeah, that is one reason that I told Tom that I wanted him to get me pregnant, I knew we have help with the baby while you and I serve the dogs and stallions, I think Tom likes that I am a Preferential receptive zoosexual, I told him he'd be the only guy fucking me unless he wants other guys fucking me with him present, like with Eric tonight, I'll see you Thursday about noon, bye, bye".

Michael, "bye".
 

Michael said, " love you ", as Ada hung up.


All Michael wanted now was for the time to pass, he was in a bad state, a state of mind that was consuming him, he called to Cunnington he came running followed by Edward, once to him, he guided them into the stables, then lead Cunnington through the door which lead to the wash area, from there a ramp lead up into the house, getting him into the house Michael gave him a treat as he said to him, " I'm just going run to town a minute" then I went back out to the stables, told Edward that he'd be right back.

 

​Michael then walked out to his rx7 complete nude, It was hot out now, he just started driving, and toward town. Michael simply was on mission, a mission that could take his mind off Ada, as soon as he got to town he started looking for a drive-up window, he first thought go back to the McDonalds were he'd thought of exposing himself once in the past, but he just drove around to different fast food drive-ups looking for one where he could see there was a older (21 or older) female working.

Michael knew of a Burger King that he'd been to quite few times it had a high window, so I knew she be able to see his erect cock, it wasn't far so he headed there, once there he covered his cock as he pulled into parking lot, parked so he could see who was working the drive up.

There fairly mature appearing female was working the drive-up window, it was about 7:30 am, so not real busy. After pondering in his mind a minute, if he should go through the drive-up and expose himself to her, just the thought had him extremely aroused, he decided to do it, as he ponder the idea to be seen by the female at the drive-up, the "idea of being seen by the female as a affirmation of a inadequate male or was he seeking humiliation? came into his mind". Completely naked, with his cock hard and slick as pre-cum flowed from his cock head, he pulled up to the order box, her voice came on, "came I help you?" she said, Michael said, "coffee black please", she replied, "please pull ahead to the window". Michael now mindlessly aroused, could not stop himself, he pulled up to the window stopped and looked up to her as she looked down into the rx7 at him, once he knew she was actually seeing his erect cock by her shocked reaction, that confirmed that she could clearly see his erect cock, then she suddenly took on a very serious look on their face, yet she then took his money from his hand for the order, then handed him his change back, as she was looking down into the car handing Michael his change his hips started jerking and he started ejaculating involuntarily onto his stomach as she watched".

​

Drive up lady, "wow, you were really horny weren't you?'.

Michael, "yes, I sorry, I just for some reason get so excited by exposing myself like this".

Drive up lady, "don't be sorry, I liked watching you squirt your cum, and you have a nice cock, I'll get your coffee, be right back".

She returns with Michael's coffee then she hands it to him as she says, "good show, do you feel inadequate as man or something, maybe your a homosexual, am I right? can't be a real man?".

Michael mumbled, "yes, so I'm not sure why I'm even turned on by exposing myself to you".

Drive up lady, "no worry, I liked seeing you do that".

Michael drives away, and heads home feeling ashamed that he just did that.

​Once home, Michael was going crazy now, Edward wanted to go back out, so I lead him back out to the stables, I thought about offering him my bottom, so he could breed me but it was hot, and I was needing a strong drink so I walked back into the house and made a strong long island ice tea. Michael sat on the couch, Cunnington hopped up and laid his long body down, then his head on my lap, I pet him as I flipped through the channels on T.V, nothing good on so I put in a v.h.s movie that I liked. "Lonesome dove", is always worth seeing over and over so I put it in to watch, still my goofy mind kept wandering back to Ada, how was she doing, he so much wished he was there looking over her, making sure she was alright, he could tell Cunnington was missing her a lot too

​Michael simple couldn't stop feeling bad about exposing himself to the young lady at the drive up window, he went out to the kitchen, found a pen and paper, and wrote a note for the young lady, it said, hi my name is Michael "I am so sorry that I exposed myself to you earlier today, I am really a normally a stable person, yet just lately I seem to be under going a sexual identity crisis, in the tune of, "I a homosexual transsexual type, yet mixed up", I needed to say I am sorry, your welcome to call me; 342-6758, sincerely Michael.

Michael then went out and hopped in the rx-7 and headed to the Burger King to see if she might still be working.

Once Michael got to the Burger King, he parked and watched the drive-up for her, sure enough she was still there, so he drove over to the ordering station, he recognized her voice, and instantly got fully erect,  Michael ordered a small coffee, then quickly got his shorts pulled down to his feet she said, "please pull up to the window", there were no cars in front of him or behind him, as he pulled up to the window, she was smiling, as he stopped, she leaned out and looked down at his body, then looked Michael in her eyes as she said, "oh my sissy-boy with the hard cock is back, can you cum again for me again?"".

Michael meekly said, "yes, I'm sorry then handed her the note, as he ejaculated in front of her, she quickly opened it and read it, then said, as she looked back at him, "is it ok if I call you when I take a break in about a hour?".

Michael meekly replied, "I'd like that a lot".

 

She said, "my name is Elle, I'll call you in about a hour when I take my break, I really would like to talk to you and watch you masturbate and cum for me again".

Michael drove off then back home.

Once home, Michael walked Edward and Cunnington down to the highway, checked the mailbox, no mail, so the walked back to the house, Michael figured it had been about 45 minutes since he pulled out of Burger King and now they were back up at the house, so he put Edward and Cunnington out in the paddock. then waited by the phone for Elle to call and wondering why she wanted to talk about.

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Elle the female at the Burger King drive-up Michael exposed himself to calls:  

​2pm--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Michael had drank about half of his beer when the phone rang, he picked it up and some what meekly said, "hi this is Michael". 

Elle said, "hi Michael this is Elle, I hope this is a good time?"

Michael replied, "yes, I'm so glad you called on time, thanks so much, I've been pacing ever since I exposed myself to you, and I'm happy to see I didn't harm you emotionally, that was very selfish of me".

Elle replies, " let put it behind us, I'm fine, but I am very interested in talking to you because you are a exhibitionist and a sissy homosexual type and my guess is that loves to suck cock and get butt fucked, am I right?".

Michael meekly replies, "yes your right".


Elle, "would you like me to watch you sucking cock?, would that turn you on?".--------------------------------------


(James and Elle are at her parent's house)

 

Michael meekly replies, "yes".

Elle, "I have a young friend, he is 16 years old, he has never had sex with anyone but me, so he is Std free/safe, I'd love to see him cum in your mouth, he has a huge cock, would you suck him off while I watch, then have him cum in your mouth, would you like that?'.

Michael meekly replies, "yes, I love sucking cock and swallowing cum".

​

Elle, "I've been jacking him off for a few weeks now, I told him if he let a guy suck his cock I might let him fuck me, he is here right now, I'll him put on the phone, I want you to ask him like a good sissy if you can suck his cock ok, his name is James, here he is".

James, "hi James here, Elle says you love sucking big cock, I'm 10 inches and fat, you want to suck it?".

Michael, "yes, please I so much want Elle to watch me as I suck your cock if that's ok, I'm a good submissive sissy boy"

James, "good, I'm looking for a loyal submissive sissy to suck my cock every day, I want sucked quite bit, a few times a day, you interested?'.

Michael, "how many times a day?, when can I met you?".

James says, "right now, you might be sucking me on the weekends as many 5 times a day, I'm at Elle's house, 124 oak st, near water tower".

Michael, "I'm a sissy I need to suck cock constantly and get butt-fucked constantly, I'm heading in right now, be there in about 10 minutes".

"For me it is so exciting for me to have females see me performing sexually as as sissy for a real Man!"

I craved performing fellatio and being sodomized since I was 7 years

Becoming a Femboy


My oldest clear memories are of around 6 years of age, at which time my Mom and Dad suddenly got a divorce, this was very traumatic, in that my life seemed turned upside down, Dad was gone, a new man suddenly started coming and spending the night.

We had a very small one-story house, a living room, kitchen, two bedrooms then at some point prior to us living there, a 2-room addition had been built on to the back of the house which became a master bedroom and a large utility room/furnace room, also where washer and dryer were.

My bedroom had two doors, the main door which opened into the hallway leading to living room in front of the house, the only bathroom was just to the left as you opened this door and walked into the little hallway.

The other door opened directly into the master bedroom, Mom and Dad's bedroom, once this new man started spending the night he and Mom would often awake me, as they walked through my bedroom nude to use the bathroom, though I'd pretend to be asleep, I'd be peeking from under the covers, once they were back in Mom's room I'd get up and peek through the crack in the door opening, they always had a small bedside lamp on so I could see fairly clearly as they had sex.

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Vicariously wanting to be like Mom

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My most vivid memory from this was seeing the man's penis erect and Mom sucking it, and to me at the time seemed so big and impressive and the desire to suck it like Mom was.

Often they would not fully close the doors of my room when doing this, and often there would be the sounds of them giggling, mom moaning etc. coming from Mom's room, I started getting up and peeking through the slightly open door into Mom's room and as they always had a night stand light on, thus I was able to clearly see them engaging in sex in different ways.

Because this went on night after night for at least a year I really can't recall how often, yet at least several times a week for a year, what I do know is that I suddenly wanted to suck a penis like I'd seen Mom do with this man, I even wanted to suck this man's penis I recall thinking as he walked nude through my bedroom and after seeing Mom sucking his penis.

I felt guilty for along time because I loved seeing Mom in this sexual way, seeing her enjoying herself, wondering if I was just objectifying her sexually? I do believe I did objectify my stepfather sexually because I had no emotional love for him.


My Insatiable desire to perform fellatio and be penetrated anally starts

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                                 My first time performing fellatio and ingesting semen

 

My 1969, I was 7 years old when I started sucking cock I just simply knew I wanted to suck cock after watching Mom sucking cock, then one glooming April day I rode my bike down to the creek to go to the beaver pond. Where the black top road went over the creek, a huge steel culvert ran under the road for the creek to run through, there I could hide my bike then hike on down stream to the beaver pond. As I was getting my bike rolled into the culvert I noticed a magazine laying right near the edge of the culvert, so after getting my bike into the culvert so it would be out of site I went and picked up the magazine. Instantly looking at the cover I knew it was a adult magazine, once I started turning the pages, it wasn't long before there on the page before me was a lady sucking a man's cock, I instantly vicariously wanted to be her!.


My chance came in early June when my friend Kevin and I were skinny dipping in the beaver pond, Kevin had climbed out of the water and sat down on a large fallen log at the edge of the pond. I couldn't take my eyes off Kevin's large man size cock hanging between his legs as I swam over to be by him, I climbed out and sat next to him. Kevin was 12 years old, it was like I was under a spell, I simply asked him if I could suck his cock, he said, "ok", I was instantly down on my knees in front of him, then so, so eagerly taking his cock in my mouth, omg!, I felt so good to finally have a cock in my mouth, like my ultimate dream coming true I remember and perfect for me, like it was meant to be. Kevin was so wonderful and kind, so I was lucky to have him for my first experience, he told me what felt good as I licked and sucked, told me to watch my teeth so I didn't cause him discomfort, then when he was ready to ejaculate he told me to hold his cock head just a in front of my open mouth so he could watch as his semen shot into my mouth and so not to gag me.

Seeing Kevin in such pleasure, hearing him moan, then taking his semen in my mouth was so wonderful to me, like I'd found my true purpose in life at that moment.

I routinely started sucking Kevin's cock, daily if possible.

​
I'd told Kevin about watching my Mom and step-father having sex as I watched through the crack in the door opening between my bedroom and mom's bedroom ever since I was 6 years old, and thus I watched mom being penetrated, including in her bottom, as well as her sucking my step-father's penis.

​

I'd told Kevin that I very much wanted him to penetrate my bottom if he ever wanted to, and explained that I simply knew my life's role was going to be a receptive sex partner for males and I knew I was born wrong, I should of been a girl, the idea of being penetrated as a though I was really a girl was what I needed and sooner or later that was what I would have to be doing.


After I been sucking Kevin for maybe a month, I was sneaking through mom's closet and dresser drawers hoping to find a garter belt and thigh-high hose so I could wear them when with Kevin because I wanted to look like a girl or at least "girly" for him, well I found a garter and thigh-highs, and to my delight a rubber dildo.
Well, the first thing I did was go into the bathroom and tried sliding the dildo up into my bottom, I was lucky because the only lube I could find in the bathroom was mineral oil and it ended up working great to lube the dildo with, after a week of practicing penetrating myself with the dildo, I was very eager to have Kevin's penis up inside my bottom.
The thigh-highs I loved wearing, and often wore them under my pants to school or any time for that matter as the made me feel "girly", Kevin liked me wearing them as well, then one Saturday morning when I finishing giving Kevin a blow-job I told him that I been practicing using the dildo on myself and I felt I was ready to have his penis up inside my bottom. Kevin asked me how long was the dildo, I told him it was about 8 inch or about the size of his penis and I could now take the entire dildo up inside me and comfortably, to my delight, Kevin told me that we could give it a try, and for me to come back over to his house at noon, his parents would be gone golfing.
Until noon, I was nervous, over whelmed with excitement, I was nervous about Kevin liking it, I simply knew this was going to be my life long role and I needed to perform for Kevin the best I possibly could, because it was extremely important to me that he wanted me in that way.

​

By the time 11am rolled around I was in the bathroom sliding the dildo in and out of my bottom to make sure I was loosened up and clean for Kevin's penis to slide up inside me, once noon arrived I was walking to Kevin's house with the bottle of mineral oil in my knapsack, and beyond words to explain how intensely eager I was to have Kevin treat me like a girl and penetrate my bottom.

Once Kevin and I got to his bedroom, I was quickly stripped naked, and Kevin was as well, Kevin then put a towel on the hardwood floor, I handed Kevin the bottle of mineral oil then got down on my hands and knees on the floor in front of him and offered my bottom to him eagerly, Kevin lubed his penis with the oil then lubed my bottom hole, I then just looked at the floor as Kevin ever so gently pushed his cock up inside me as I quivered and gasped, Kevin said to me once his cock was completely up inside of me, "Michael this feels so good, your my first for this, I've never even been with a girl", I replied in a whimpering voice, "oh, I want to be your girl so much, having you up inside is so good for me".

Kevin pushed in and out of me gently maybe 3 or 4 time before he moaned out, "Michael I going cum!", I just whimpered and quivered with excitement, in large part due to the fact that Kevin was actual about to ejaculate up inside my bottom.
Once I knew Kevin was actually ejaculating into me, it was beyond wonderful, life changing, it was like I could really be like a girl for Kevin, and I loved it intensely.

After we finished, Kevin was the one who said, "we have to do this again and a lot".

​

Kevin studded me again after we waited about a half an hour, this time he was able to last longer, those giving me a better idea of what I would have to be ready for, getting my bottom used to being penetrated, I was able to accommodate him well to my relief as I was so afraid that I might not be able to perform for him in this capacity, so I was relieved as much as I was excited by the act it's self.

After that, Kevin would try to stud me daily if at all possible, as well as having me suck him, Kevin also started studding Meredith as well. 

I thought I was completely psychologically emasculated/feminized after the first time I sucked Kevin's penis, yet once I had his penis ejaculating up inside my bottom I knew I was 100% emasculated/feminized.

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Mid June

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There was a horse boarding stables exclusively for stallions on the road which I would take when to get down to the creek and beaver pond, and on the same property, I would often stop and feed the stallions grass and Edward a jack donkey as I stood at the fence along the road side, I been doing this since late spring, ever since I started riding my bike that far, when in actuality was only about a 5 minute bike ride from my house. Around the first of June on Saturday mourning I met Mr. Johnson who owned the property and stables, I asked if it was ok if I played in the woods and along the creek, he said that was ok, then I asked him about Edward, Mr. Johnson explained to me that a couple started boarding him here about a year ago, yet they called him and told him to please take Edward because they were moving and would not be able to take him with. I was in love with Edward the first time I seen him, I said to Mr. Johnson, "can I buy him from you, my Aunt has a big farm about 10 miles north of town and I hope to move there, right now I go spend most weekends there".
Mr Johnson said, "I will sell him to you for 50 dollars, once I talk to your Mom and Aunt Becky, so have them both call me". we walked to his truck he wrote his number down for me.

Believe me, I raced home and called Aunt Becky because she likely be home, sure enough she was, she said it would be fine to bring Edward out to the farm and your 7th birthday is June 17 so Edward will be my birthday present for you, and Eric could come get Edward in the horse trailer, yet not until her and mom talked and she says it is ok.
When Mom got home from work, I wasted no time in telling her about buying Edward, that Aunt Becky said it was ok to move him out to the farm, but she needed to talk to Aunt Becky and Mr. Johnson, Mom called Aunt Becky as her and I sat at the kitchen table, her and Aunt Becky talked for a short while, then hung up the phone and asked for Mr. Johnson's phone number. As I listened to her talk to Mr. Johnson, it was quickly apparent they knew each other, they talked a bit then to my delight she said to Mr. Johnson, I will call Becky and have her call you and talk about arranging to come pick-up Edward, she bye and hung up and called Aunt Becky back and told to call Mr. Johnson right now, he is expecting your call then Mom hung up. Aunt Becky called us back about a half hour later and told us her Eric would drive in a pick me up at 8am tomorrow and we go get Edward. 

Edward gets Moved in at Aunt Becky's and I spend rest of summer living on Aunt Becky's farm


After about a week of Edward living at the farm, I walked into the stables to feed Edward, and caught him turned and holding his fully erect penis in his mouth, his hips jerking, then as I stared he began ejaculating on the floor, I was instantly over come with the desire to suck Edward's penis, overwhelmed with the desire!.

I got him feed them he and I took him for a walk down to the quarry lake, which is about a 10 minute walk through the north pasture through the gate, then a short distance through the woods, the whole while thinking about how can I suck Edward's penis, will he allow me.
Getting back from our walk, I took Edward in the washroom for the horses, and started giving Edward a shower/bath as I got on my knees and started washing his tummy, then back to his sheath, the his big balls, Edward's penis quickly dropped out and grew longer and longer as I watched, I gently began washing his penis, rinsed it, then leaned down and took Edward's penis in my mouth, in moments Edward was erect and making tiny thrusts into my mouth, I held the shaft of his penis firmly and after about 30 seconds Edward was ejaculating in my mouth.

My life changed instantly, it was though I completely belonged to Edward, I was his girl know!, I don't know how to put this in words, other than I knew I completely belonged to Edward as his girl, I knew one day he would be penetrating my bottom like a girl, sleeping with me, I was going be his full time girl forever.
After that I started sucking Edward's penis and ingesting his semen nearly every day, I wanted Edward's penis up in my bottom, yet it was so long I was worried about trying it.
 

I always need to be "owned", the belong to another and used for sex as they wish

"First time I was seen by females nude and sexually humiliated and objectified"

​

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Two encounters without my consent in the beginning

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The encounter with Peggy, Kim and Mike;

"I was 7 years old, and it was shortly after I'd started sucking my friend Kevin's cock, one weekend my step sister Peggy, Mom, my stepfather and myself went to visit my step father's parent's farm which was about a hours drive away, Peggy, Kim and I were playing hide and seek, I was hiding in a shed when Peggy and her cousin Kim who was 11 found me, together they suddenly just started stripping my clothes off, once I was nude they crazy like started kissing my mouth, playing with my penis, giggling, being silly, then Mike, Kim's brother suddenly came walking in, he pulled out his penis and Peggy started sucking his penis, I remember Kim saying, "I'll go get the Vaseline Mike", After that I briefly remember getting on my knees sucking Mike's penis. Then I felt Kim putting Vaseline on my bottom as I was on my knees, Mike took is penis out of my mouth, quickly walked behind me, and then I could feel his penis slowly being pushed up inside my bottom, then he slowly started thrusting his penis in and out of my bottom. Next thing I remember is Mike, Peggy and Kim hurrying out of the shed, then me going in the house, hurrying to the toilet because my bottom was sore and I wanted to wash it, all of was like a dream or in a type of shock then I remember looking in the toilet after I'd tried pooping which I couldn't, yet I expelled some of his semen and seeing tiny amount of blood which really put my in a surreal mental state, like it was a crazy dream and not real, traumatic, yet a great sense that I was completely 100% emasculated now and as though being transformed into a girl or knowing I could never be like a Man now.

I knew it was semen because I been sucking my friend Kevin's penis rountely for several months prior to this encounter since and Kevin who was 12 years old always ejaculated in my mouth for me to ingest, the next day as I was sucking Kevin's penis I told him about the encounter with Peggy, Kim and Mike, and that Mike had penetrated my bottom, and it all just happened so fast I was in a trance of sorts, thankfully Kevin wasn't mad. 

I never seen Kim and Mike again, they'd just been visiting, I remember them saying the lived in Indiana, maybe a good thing because I know I'd have wanted him to do that with me again, even though he objectified me sexually and didn't ask if he could do this to me, the moment he offered his penis to me to suck I eagerly did, he didn't have to ask to penetrate me, when began pushing his penis up inside my bottom I didn't try to stop him. We ended up staying at my step father's parent's farm until late that night, Mike took me out the shed two more times that day and had me suck him for awhile, then he penetrated my bottom and ejaculated in me, I only wish my first time for me to be really truly getting treated like a girl and having a penis up inside me was with Kevin. That next day after experiencing Mike's penis in my bottom I was begging Kevin to start penetrating my bottom, he did, and continued to rountely after that."

​

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I was 10 years old, while in Scouts during winter months we'd often go to the old Research Hospital indoor swimming pool which was a very large indoor pool, while swimming a Scout leader/helper by the name of Bob would be there as a life guard usually, Bob was 25 years old sexy and a great swimmer, Bob first took me sexually at a time I was distant from the others in the pool, he came up from behind me when I was in water just deep enough where I couldn't touch my feet to the bottom, he quickly grabbed me super tight around the chest, rendering me helpless, then with the other hand he yanked my swim trunks down then quickly slid his erect penis up inside my bottom, all the while telling me to remain quiet as he held me very tight and with quick short thrusts he studded me until he ejaculated into me, then he'd let me go like nothing happened.

After that he'd do that to me every time we went swimming at the indoor research hospital pool, it was like he had me under a spell or trained to submit, after the first time he'd fucked me he'd wait for at the far end of the pool, once I seen him there I'd swim down to him stand, then turn so my back was to him, he'd pull my swim trunks down, he'd always be very hard already and his had what seemed like very large penis yet I actually hadn't seen it yet, due to being under water his penis would easily slide up inside me, within 30 seconds and quick hard short thrusts into me with his penis he'd ejaculate. I'd then go back to being with the Scouts, often he would stud me several times a night in the pool after I started volunteering/offering myself to him. I guess I let him do it to me because I looked up to him as a Man and he was cute, and I just loved the feeling of having his penis up inside me, he had me under a spell of sorts, and it made me feel girly and wanted.

 Bob only lived about a 15 minute bike ride from my house, and he wanted me to start performing fellatio on him, so I started going to he house often, he'd have me perform fellatio on him and he'd ejaculate in my mouth, or he'd penetrate me and ejaculate in my bottom, whatever he preferred I wanted both ways very much, then one day he told me to ask Meredith to come with me next time, that Meredith had been having sex with him as well and he wanted to watch as Meredith and I had sex.
I talked to Meredith about what Bob had said, and told him that Bob wanted us both to sex as he watched us, well Meredith and I went to his place several days later, Bob watched as I sucked Meredith's penis, then he started butt fucking me, then he had Meredith butt-fuck as he watched, Meredith was ejaculating by then, so Bob told Meredith to pull out and ejaculate in my mouth when he was ready, Meredith did that, then Bob fucked me and ejaculated in my bottom. 

That didn't last long, Meredith and I seen Bob together maybe twice after, then it turned out Bob was having sex with some of the other Scouts other then Meredith and I and he some how got "outed", he simply disappeared and I never seen him again, never heard what happened exactly it was all real hush, hush. 

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I never told anyone not even Kevin and Meredith swore not to tell Kevin, not until years later when seeing a psychologist in the mid 80's did I tell anyone that I'd cheated on Kevin.

I never cheated on Kevin again after that and felt horrible for not being able to tell him. Kevin was 15 years old now and after that encounter with Bob, one day I told Kevin he could share me with other guys he knew if he wanted to. Kevin, had already been watching Meredith sodomize me and me performing fellatio on Meredith at this time, Kevin knew I was sucking Edward's penis rountely and he told me that he like watching me with other guys, Edward and Cosso as well because he knew I felt so good getting the sexual attention
 

1973, I was 11 years old and Kevin was 16, Kevin were in my bedroom one June day, summer break from school had started, thus Mom and step-father were at work, thus we felt it was safe, so both got naked and I started giving Kevin a blow-job, after sucking him maybe 5 minutes my bedroom door opens and there is Mom looking at us, Kevin instantly starts ejaculating on the front of me as he tries to cover himself, I just started giggling as Mom stood and stared about 10 seconds then pulled the door shut.

Kevin and I both got dressed and cleaned up quickly in the bathroom, then walked out in the kitchen hoping to find Mom, and we did find her sitting at the kitchen table having a bowl of soup, I quickly told her I was sorry for shocking her as Kevin and I sat down.

Mom response was, "yeah I got quite a show, how long you two been involved sexually?". 
I said, "I started sucking Kevin's cock and getting penetrated by him 4 years ago"

Mom replied, "after you started observing your step-father and I having sex".

I was shocked when she said that then said, "I never knew you knew that I had watched you's".

Mom (Judy) said, "I didn't until just now, but began suspecting something after I found a pair of my thigh-highs and a garter, and my dildo in your dresser drawer while putting some t-shirts in your drawer about a year ago, I did started suspecting that you were homosexual".

I replied, "yes, I am very much a homosexual that only takes the female-role, I'm Kevin's girl so to speak, yet Kevin isn't homosexual he just treats me like a girl". 

Mom replies, "so you two are having intercourse as well, or should I say, Michael your taking Kevin's penis up inside your bottom?".

I replied, "yes".

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Mom actually smiled as she said, "After seeing Kevin's big penis a moment ago, I can't blame you for wanting Kevin as your lover".

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I replied, "I like that about Kevin a lot, but I love him because he treats me so well".

Kevin says, " Judy, I do love Michael and consider him like my surrogate girlfriend, and even though I not homosexual, we still can enjoy our sexual relationship intensely, and we've talked, and Michael realizes I'm likely meet a female to be with sexually, if I do I want her to accept Michael and my relationship".

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I say, "I know if Kevin does, I still want him to have sex with me and hope he still will wants to have sex with me, I know I watched Meredith sucking Kevin and seen Kevin penetrating Meredith as well, and I love watching them, even if I am not present when they have sex I don't get jealous so if it were a girl I don't see it being any different, I've even told Kevin many times that I'd love to watch you and him having sex". (compersion)

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Kevins says, "I'll never want to stop being your boyfriend ever, promise".

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Mom grins as she says, "oh my, please don't tempt me, it wouldn't take much persuading to get me into that scenario, especially now because I found out your stepfather (Mel) is cheating on me,  I just filed for a divorce last week and told him to move out by this weekend".

 

I look at Kevin and say, "I'd love it a lot if you and Mom become sex partners, even get married".

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Kevin stumbles, mumbles embarrassed, "well I'd like that if you want Judy, I've fantasied about being with often for a long time."

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Mom gets up, says, "age of consent is 16 in our state and I know your 16 Kevin cause your driving, and I know I am eager to get that big cock of your's in my mouth right now" as she walks over to Kevin and kisses him on the lips, then takes him by the hand and leads him up out of his chair, then off to my bedroom, I follow, as we all get into my bedroom, Mom tells Kevin to sit on the bed, he does, Mom then gets on her knees in front of him and starts getting his shorts pulled off. To my amazement Kevin is completely erect by the time Mom has his shorts completely off, Mom wastes no time in taking Kevin's penis into her mouth and begins sucking and licking it eagerly.

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I just said, "oh my, this is a dream come true for me", as I watched them both in a such a erotic way. 

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Kevin didn't last long before saying out loud as he moaned and squirmed about, "Judy I going cum".

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Mom replied, "shoot it in my mouth Kevin, I'm ready and I want to taste you cum so much".

Kevin did just that, as I watch Mom gobble the semen down as he ejaculated into her mouth.

I could only say, "oh that looks so good" as I watched Mom lick and suck Kevin's entire cock and balls clean.

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After we'd all gotten our wits about ourselves back,

I said to Mom, "you know I can learn a lot by watching you and Kevin, I hate to say this now but actually if I'd had the chance to suck Mel's cock when I first started watching you's have sex I would have, like when he'd walk through my bedroom nude before and after you and him would have sex, I'd dream of sucking his cock just as you were". (Vicarious Erotic arousal/Compersion)

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Mom replies, " I'm sure glad that never happened".

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I replied, "me as well, especially after having him live with a short time, it was like having a stranger in the house constantly, I just so happy you and Kevin can be lovers and get married hopefully".

Mom says, "I like that idea a lot, but we will have see what Kevin thinks about that after being with me a few years, (mom looking at Kevin) says, "maybe in a couple of years when Kevin turns 18 the marriage, living with us full time can be a reality".

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The following day Mom came home for lunch, Kevin and her had full intercourse as I watched, this continued to happen nearly every day that week at lunch, Mom would come home for lunch, Kevin and her would make love and I'd watch. (a intense form of compersion/vicarious erotic arousal for myself, even a form of being cuckold for me)

Once my step-father got moved out over the weekend, then Mom and Kevin would have sex any time whether I was there or not, and on weekends he would often spend the night and sleep with Mom, Kevin and Mom had become like a couple, and it was wonderful for me knowing they were sleeping in the next room.

Starting 7th grade and how I ended up going to live on the farm with Aunt Becky full time (7th grade age 13, 1975)

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​I'd went through puberty and now was sucking my own penis and ejaculating in my own mouth, which wonderful for me, thus I began sucking my penis nearly every day.

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I was in 7th grade, a much larger and completely different school that was 7 through 9 grades, plus a open shower policy for gym class, I was very nervous about open shower, due to the fact that I knew I was sexually attracted to guys, and sense going through puberty sex was on my mind constantly now and not knowing how I would react to seeing all these fellow male students nude.

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There were also a lot black students in this new school, where my middle school had some black students, there were many more black guys here at this new school, anyway it was the first week there, I was sitting on the bench in front of my locker which was near the open showers, and I glanced into the showers and could clearly see Rod one of black guys in my gym class showering, he had the biggest cock I'd ever seen, thus I stared, well he caught me staring at him.

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​​​​​​​Well later in the day he came up behind me while I was walking down the hall and whispered in my ear, "I bet you'd love to suck my big black cock wouldn't you", I just kept walking and didn't reply.

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After that, in gym class he started saying things to me every day, things like "have you sucked cock yet, bet you have, do you want to suck cock, don't worry I'm be nice to you when you suck mine", I'd just ignore him. One day in gym while a friend and I were get dressed at our lockers after gym was over, Rod walked by us nude on his way to the shower and said out loud, "I know you want it Michael, I wait for you in the woods", My friend looked at me and said, "what did Rod mean by that?", I was so embarrassed and rattled,  I all I could say to my friend was, "nothing".

The thing is I very much wanted to suck his cock, I'd been sucking my friends Meredith and Kevin's cock since I was 7 and Kevin was 12, so he was ejaculating in mouth, that is until his dad was transferred do to his job when I was in 6th grade, Meredith had just started ejaculating in my mouth.

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Then one day Rod said to me, "if you want to suck my cock, meet me in the woods behind the dairy at 4pm and you can suck it", well after I got home from school at 3pm, all I knew was I wanted to suck his cock so much, and I also figured if I started sucking his cock it would shut him up, keep him from embarrassing me in front of others. At 3:45, I got on my bike and rode down to the woods behind the dairy and sure enough Rod showed up, he rode up to me on his bike, then he told me to follow him to a spot in the woods where I could safely suck his cock, once we got to the spot, he unzipped his shorts, pulled out his already huge erect cock, he then told me to get down and start sucking it like a good sissy boy, I eagerly did, in less then a minute he was ejaculating in mouth.

After that day, he and I would meet at that same spot every day after school, I'd perform fellatio on him and swallow his cum, this went on about a week then he told me he had a older friend who would like for me to start sucking his cock and he'd bring him to meet me tomorrow, by that time I was his trained submissive, he'd been really good to me, I was eager and ready for him to start sodomizing me and would done almost anything for him, so I said ok. 

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Well the next day, Rod and Steve another black guy from school were waiting for me, thus I sucked both of them until they ejaculated in my mouth, the following day another black guy from school was with Rod, Rod and Steve both sodomized me, this went on for a couple of weeks until I'd sucked 9 different black guys from school, so I was drawing  attention meeting the guys in the woods, it would very often be 2-4 of nine the guys together that I'd suck after school each day.

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Then they all started sodomizing me.

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I started getting gang-banged regularly by all nine of them at once, sometimes more guys were there, on the weekends, especially Saturdays if I wasn't able to go to Aunt Becky's, I suck and get penetrated most of the day if I could, then when home I'd suck my own penis until I had an orgasm and ejaculated in my mouth.

                                                                      Outed at school

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After about 2 months of doing this, I was walking down the crowded hallway at school at someone yelled out loud from down the hall, "Michael loves to suck cock!", after that I was really humiliated daily it seemed, a different student yelling, "Michael is gay etc.", different guys coming up to me asking if I really liked sucking cock etc.", hearing student whispering about it in class.

After about 2 week of the constant getting called gay etc., I wanted to quit school, due it being so traumatic I developed severe OCD of the checking type/obsessive type, such as thoughts of other male students I didn't really know, every day at school I would have to get multiple bathroom passes due to none stop diarrhea.

Moving out to Live with Aunt Becky full time 1975

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 I told mom I couldn't take it any longer, all the harassing, name calling about me being sissy homosexual and sucking cock at school, Mom asked me, if I been sucking other boys at school, if they'd had their penis up inside my bottom yet?, I told I'd been sucking 9 different black guys from school and they had all had their penis up inside my bottom at least once and they had started gang-banging now, if I didn't move, I didn't know if I could quit having sex with the guys from school. (I didn't say anything to mom about the OCD, because I didn't know what was happening to mind, plus she already felt guilt about me seeing her and my stepfather having sex, her not being more careful about it). 

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Mom asked, How many guys have you been with at once?, I told her that last weekend I went to Rods house and there were 6 guys there when I arrived, yet different guys kept showing up, a guy would thrust into me while sucked another, then the guy who was thrusting into would pull out and ejaculate in mouth, as a another guy started penetrated me, I counted about 20 guys ejaculating in my mouth and Rod finished it all by ejaculating in my bottom, Rod told me it had been 21 plus himself after everybody had left.

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Mom knew I been sucking Edward's penis for several years, and she'd caught me on several occasions sucking Cosso's penis, and caught Cosso and I locked in a copulatory-tie several times she asked if I was wanted Edward to use my bottom like that?, she didn't know yet but I'd just started taking Edward, Henri's and Sammy's and Cosso's penis up inside my bottom already, I was reluctant to tell her that, but I told her Edward was, Henri and Sammy the two stallion ponies and Cosso had been doing it to me as well for several months, which was true. I explained I needed to really just belong to Edward, Henri, Sammy and Cosso as their girl, if Kevin and Meredith wanted me, I perform for them as well.

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Any way Mom walked away, went to the phone called Aunt Becky and talked to her about the whole situation, Aunt Becky told mom to get me and Cosso moved to her place over the weekend, it was it was a Friday, I never returned to that school, and began attending a new school (Jensen group school) the following week. Until then Aunt Becky and Eric were the only ones that knew I was getting "bred" by Edward, Henri, Sammy and Cosso, they I also knew I wanted to be pretty much exclusively a female-roled receptive partner for large dogs, jack donkeys and stallion ponies, I also was now sucking all 9 of the full size stallion's cocks over at Susan and Eric's Stallion stables at the farm to the east on and ingesting their semen.

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October 1975 Mom soon sold the house and moved out to Aunt Becky's, Kevin had turned 18, Kevin moved out to Aunt Becky's to live with Mom. (Mom and Kevin never married but remained together until Mom died suddenly from a heart defect (Mitral valve prolapse) in 1992).

Mom, Kevin and I become Jensen group members

Ever since I started watching Mom have sex when I was 7 years old, I simply knew I wanted to be a girl like her.

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