Third-gender Artist Model
22 years experience as a life drawing artist's model
50 years as a submissive sissy femboy
I identify as a:
Pre-Op homosexual transsexual
berdache/third-gender type
100% female-roled receptive male
Preferential "Class X" submissive 100% female-roled receptive zoosexual from 1970-2000
(I became celibate as a zoosexual in 2000)
Former female-roled
receptive zoosexual
1970 to 2000
From 1970 to 2000, I consider my core identity to be a submissive Preferential female-roled receptive zoosexual for large intact male dogs and intact male equines.
Psychologically I have a "Pre-Op" Male to Female Homosexual Transexual Identity
The reason I refer to myself as "third-gender" is because I am physically a male, yet psychologically I feel like a female.
I've been a owned-collared "free Use" submissive, 100% female-roled femboy
since 1975
I got caged in 1999, I am 100% psychologically feminized/emasculated
"In 2000 I started serving only human males sexual"
("I only model wearing a cage")
It is intented to figure my own self out better, why I am who I am
though this is the exhibitionistic
element for me
because I am a
"exhibitionist"
I truly love modeling and modeling for artist has no erotic element for me.
My questions I've struggled with all my life,
why do I need treated sexually like a female.
"And wish to be Female"
Many questions
The content is intended for educational, research and journaling purposes Much of the content is in Scenario Form
thus whether fact or fiction, is by interpretation.
If only;
"How things could of turned out dilemma"
"Like a thought experiment of sorts"
or
" Some aspects based on fact "
" A hodgepodge script "
"Thought experiment"
My Web Journal
"Like an Actor preparing for a script in order to be convincing"
"A Study and Outline for my Novels;
fiction novel: "The Jensen Group"
and
"No One needs to be an another more then the Transsexual, No One needs another more then the Exhibitionist"
(a life as a submissive female-roled receptive zoosexual)
" As much as Life Drawing can express Reality, it can express Fantasy "
NSFW
contains nudity and sexual content
A journey of "Living vicariously in a imagined scenario"
All videos, photos, gifs
are for illustrative purposes
established
FEBRUARY 19th, 2020
Contact at;
note: most of the imagery on my site is for illustrative purposes to illustrate how I became completely psychologically feminized/emasculated and how my identity revolves around the need to be female-roled both sexually and non-sexually.
Forever editing the site
My intense need for Affirmation
To go back to My earliest years when my identity was set,
I have to go back to age 6 when my Mom and Dad got divorced.
1968
It seemed like the day my Real Father moved out of the house Mom had a new Man
spending the night, well my bedroom was attached to Mom's bedroom with a door, thus my room and Mom's room both had two doors, the quickest way to the one and only bathroom for Mom was to go through my bedroom, thus our connecting door never got completely closed.
Soon I'd be awoke in the night with sounds of Mom moaning and squealling, so I peek through the gap in the partially open door and see Mom and her new boyfriend having sex, this went on very often, soon this New Man became my step-father.
My identity is clearly/set defined vicariously
I absolutely knew I wanted to be like Mom and I wanted a Man to treat me like Mom was being treated
May of 1970 I started sucking my jack donkey Edward's penis
The Importance of Affirmation for Transgender People
Affirmation — whether self-affirmation or external affirmation from others — is deeply important for transgender individuals, as it directly impacts mental health, self-esteem, and overall well-being.
Psychological Transgender Affirmation
Psychological transgender affirmation refers to the practice of supporting and validating a person’s gender identity without attempting to “fix” or change it. It is grounded in the understanding that gender identity is a core aspect of self, and affirming it reduces distress and improves mental health outcomes - American Psychological Association
Core Principles
Affirmation over correction: The focus is on aligning a person’s outward expression, social identity, and body with their internal sense of gender, rather than trying to change it.
My own personal affirmation;
“My body is mine, and I choose to live authentically in it, I know I am sexually a slut but that is what I need".
My identity is:
Sexual Inverted/Pre-Op androphilic transsexual
&
Female-roled receptive zoosexual
Slut!
From Autobiography of an Androgyne:
by Earl Linn
(He calls himself "Jennie June""
The following account is the only writing I've come across where another male is similar to myself,
he identifies as a "girl-boy", like myself he started performing fellatio quite routinely at age 7, and had a insatiable desire to perform fellatio.
Excerpts from Autobiography of an Androgyne:
"One other boy, a year older than myself, became an even greater favorite. From my fifth to seventh year, our relations were almost as intimate as those of a husband and wife. We used to play "husband and wife," although the fact of conjugal relations was the farthest from our thoughts. When I reached the age of seven, our relations ceased, since we were sent to different schools and he began to play with normal boys, while I henceforth shared the pastimes of the little girls and had them almost exclusively for my companions. In subsequent years of our boyhood, he asked for fellatio several times, but I refused through shame.
My addiction was common knowledge among the boys, and others sought it. While engaged in games with boys, sometimes fellatio would occur every few minutes. Before reaching the age of seven, I had doubtless had more than one thousand such experiences. I of course always took the more humiliating part. Only once in my life, at the age of thirty-six, has another taken that part with me, much to my disgust. Out of nearly 800 intimates during my lifetime, only one ever sought to take that part.
I told these boy playmates to call me "Jennie," and encouraged them to use sexual argot to me. I instinctively hid all my sexual experiences from everybody except my boy intimates, though some of them proclaimed my addiction abroad in my hearing and much to my shame. Only once my mother questioned me suspiciously as to why I entered an outhouse every little while with my boy friend, but I counteracted her suspicion.
I was the only girl-boy of my immediate neighborhood, and from the seventh to the twelfth year of my life, was looked upon by all the other children as more girl than boy. When, after the age of seven, I made acquaintances farther off than in my own block, I became acquainted with three other girl-boys on three adjacent blocks, and a number of others in the village. It was common knowledge among the boys of the school. After they became adults, three became notorious among the sporting adolescents of the village, as I learned through a brother who belonged to that class". - Jennie June
My addiction of course
is not only performing fellatio, yet equally being penetrated anally.
&
My intimates from age 7 yrs old to 2000 is about 650 different human males in 30 years,
(1970 to 2000)
About 550 different stud dogs
A some very important dynamics between my male lover and me is;
He needs to tell me what to do, make me his submissive, treat me like his slut, call me a slut, sissy-slut, whatever he wishes, I need to be objectified sexually.
example;
If he wants a blow-job, I don't want him to ask me, I want him to tell me to suck his cock!
By then Men treating me like a slut, talking to like a slut, Affirms to me that they know
my role, they accept my role for them and use me in my role!
The above is from; Jennie June (autobiographer) - Wikipedia
The above states that Jenny June had intense yearnings for performing masochistic sexual acts
(which I'm certain means his insatible desire to perform fellatio), I read the book and that has to be the meaning of masochistic sexual acts in regards to Jennie June.
I myself have considered myself masochistic, such as my desired to be ganged-banged, especially by many men at once (50 or more), having guys ejaculating in my mouth and swallowing his cum while others watch, the guys calling me a sissy-slut, all above, especially as women are watching me (a form of humiliation/them seeing what a pathetic man I am ) all these I consider a type of masochism in the "humiliation by oneself or another person" form. Though not often, I will at times beg a guy to pee in my mouth as others watch.
The best way to read Autobiography of an Androgyne;
Once I started sucking Edward's penis
It was as though being the way I was, was the way I had to be!
Soon after, I started performing fellatio on a neighborhood friends, Kevin he was 12 years old, thus he was able to get erect and ejaculate in my mouth, and Meredith was a year older than me, yet he let me start sucking his penis.
Fall of 1970, as a Cub Scouts we were swimming at the Old Research Hospital swimming pool one evening. (which was an Olympic size pool).
We had a Scout leader/helper by the name of Bob, he would be there as a kind of a life guard usually, Bob was 25 years old sexy and a great swimmer, I was at the shallow from the others in the pool they were all jumping off diving boards, when Bob surprised me from behind when I was in water just deep enough where I couldn't touch my feet to the bottom, he quickly grabbed me super tight around the chest, rendering me helpless, then with the other hand he yanked my swim trunks down then quickly slid his erect penis up inside my bottom, all the while telling me to remain quiet as he held me very tight and with quick short, hard thrusts of his penis he butt-fucked me, he huffed and puffed as he ejaculated up inside of me, then he let me go like nothing happened, he'd say it's our secret.
I was in shock, and it was like a surreal dream, but I knew it was real by the way my bottom felt, as the evening passed Bob hung out with me, talking to from time to time as I swam about alone.
When we were very much away from the others Bob asked me how I liked what we had just done, I meekly told him I liked what he'd done very much, I want to be like my Mom and have sex like she does".
Bob says, "So you watched your Mom having sex with your Dad?".
I say, "no Mom and Dad are divorced, I watch Mom and her new boyfriend having sex".
Bob replies, "you've seen her boyfriend sliding his penis up inside your Mom's vagina?".
I reply, "yes, and watch Mom suck his penis".
Bob then asked if I wanted to start coming to his house, he told me he lived real close to me, near Nellie Swanson School, we can tell your Mom I could pick you up and bring you home since the Research pool is completely on other side of town, I can take you to my house on the way back first so I can penetrate your bottom, you can suck my penis as well, you want to do that.
I told him yes!, I was extremely eager for Bob to do that to me again!
Though it was traumatic/dramatic the first time Bob fucked me, I'd been longing to suck a adult Man cock, I very much was Bob's very eager consenting partner all times afterwards, once I felt is big Man's penis sliding in and out of my bottom, it was all I could think about, and I so much want a Man's penis in me again and again and I wanted to suck his penis as well!
Bob talked to Mom about him picking me up and taking me to Research Hospital pool with him, Mom said that would be fine.
So, Bob drove a pickup truck which had a bench seat, he had me sucking his penis as we drove to the pool or on the way back, then after swimming was over, we'd go back to his house and he'd butt-fuck me, then drive me home.
Bob wanted to see me more and I wanted to see him more though; we were only going to the pool two night a week, the pine wood derby was coming up, so Bob told me to tell Mom that he'd help me build my pine wood derby car, so I could start riding my bike over to his house after school.
So, along with seeing Bob on the nights we went to the pool, I started riding my bike over to Bob's after school, or on weekends, Bob would always have me suck his cock first then he'd fuck me, Bob was fucking me 4-6 times a week by then.
Within a week after Bob was butt-fucking me, I offer myself to my Great Dane Cosso and he soon had me locked in a copulatory-tie, and he was soon fucking me often as well.
I told Bob that Cosso was fucking me now.
At the Pool
I'd then go back to being with the Scouts, a few nights he "bred" me several times, I started volunteering/offering myself to him during the evenings, he'd had me start meeting him in the showers, have me suck his penis a bit then he "breed" in the shower stall with the water running on us. I guess I let him do it to me because I looked up to him as a Man and he was cute, and I just loved the feeling of having his penis up inside me, in a strange way it was like he had me under a spell of sorts, yet I liked it so much, having a penis up inside me made me feel girly and I wanted so much to feel girly, so just kept letting him do it. Bob only lived about a 10-minute bike ride for our house, so by the time I was 10 years old Bob screwed me and/or had me sucking his cock 3 or 4 time a week until I was 11 years old.
One day Bob asked me if I'd be interested in meeting some men that I been talking to about you?
My reply was, "what have you told them about me ?".
Bob said, "I just told them that you were a very sexy 8 year old that likes having sex with adult men, I told them that you love sucking cock and love getting butt-fucked, I promise, don't worry they are great guys, and I completely trust them, he also told me that some of the guys had big stud dogs I might like".
I replied, "sure if you trust them, and yes I want to get bred by their dogs".
Me becoming a true Catamite for a Group of Men
Then one day in July 1971,
Age 9, I was at Bob's and just finished giving him a blow-job when a guy about 25 years old shows up at Bob's, Bob introduce me to his friend as James, then Bob looked at me and said, "Michael, I'd like you to give James a blow-job, James has a nice big cock that I know you'll like!, I thought James was nice, and cute, so I meekly said, "yes, James then sat on the couch, I got on my knees on the floor in front of James and got his shorts pulled off, by the time I had his shorts completely off, James cock was fully erect, I eagerly started sucking it, as I did, Bob got behind me, lubed my bottom then push his own hard cock up inside me. Bob slowly slid his cock in and out of me as I sucked James cock, soon James then said, "Michael I have three friends that are looking for a young feminine guy like you who will start giving us blow-jobs on a regular basis, plus butt fuck you too, would you be interested in meeting them today?"
I took James's cock out of my mouth, and held it and stroked it as I replied, "how old are they?"
James replied, well Greg is 25 like me, Steven is 28 I think and David is 30 years old, they all nice, in good shape, no worries". my reply was, " I'll meet them, if I'm not comfortable with it, I'll just say that I have plans and need to get going".
James replied, "fair enough, let me hop up and go give them a call, James stands and walks in the kitchen to use Bob's phone.
As Bob continues studding me, he says, "Michael you'll like David, Greg and Steven, they are very nice guys and will treat you well, I'm glad Bob said that as I was a bit nervous about meeting the guy guys and committing to perform sexually for them. Bob calls out he about to climax, he then pulls his cock out of my bottom, then as usually I turn as Bob comes around to the side of me and then he ejaculates in my open mouth as though I'm a baby bird eager to be feed. I thought about what to tell James, then told yes I'll meet them, James replies I'll go call them now.
James returns from calling the guys, sits back down on the couch and says, "the guys said they'd be here in 15-20 minutes", I then went back to sucking Jame's cock. After about 10 more minutes of sucking Jame's cock he ejaculated in my mouth, I got up and walked to the bathroom, douched my bottom and lubed it in case the guys wanted to stud me, I gargled with mouth wash and washed my face and the weather was quite warm so I stripped naked.
By the time I walked out to join James and Bob in the living room, one of the guys was sitting on a chair next to the couch, James introduced us, he was Greg, then Greg asked if I could suck he cock, he was cute, I quickly replied yes, and then James quickly got naked from the waist down then quickly got sat back down in the chair, I then eager got down on my knees and started performing fellatio on him. I'd been performing fellatio on James maybe 5 minutes when one of the other guys walked in the living room, James introduced him as Steven, then James asked me if it was ok if Steven started studding me, I meekly replied, "Steven, please lube yourself up with Vaseline or mineral oil, then ejaculate in my mouth when your ready cum please". I returned to sucking James, Bob goes and gets a towel so I can kneel on, then soon I felt Steven's hard cock slowly pushing into my bottom, James said, "Michael, Steven's cock is quite big, but he'll be gentle, yet if it hurts just say so". Steven says, "yes for sure say so Michael, I only wish to do this if it feels good for you too". Steven very slowly then started pushing his cock deeper and deeper up inside me, all I could do was gasp, and whimper as he did, but it felt so wonderful having him fill me up with his big cock.
As Steven fucked me, I could only stroke and hold Greg's cock with one hand and hold onto his thigh with the other as Steven non-stop slowly slid his cock in and out of me. After a bit of silence Greg says, "you liking this don't you Michael?".
I mumbled meekly, "yes, ever since age six and would watch my Mom suck and get fucked by my step-father through the crack in my slightly open bedroom door I've want men to fuck me, my step-father used to walk through my room at night naked thinking I was a sleep, yet I wasn't, seeing his big thick cock swaying as he walked made me want to suck him so much", Greg replies, "if you had the chance would you have sucked his cock or even let him fuck you?".
I moaned out, "yes, the way I wanted it, yes!, ever since I wanted sex with Men, real grown Men!". Greg replies, "well I'm a grown Man and I've been looking for a young cute guy like yourself that takes the female role completely, are loves sex with grown Men, is that your role Michael?", I mumbled desperately , "yes, I want to be treated like a girl by grown Men please!". Greg, "how old are you Michael?". I replied, "eight".
Greg, continues slowly sliding his cock in and out of me, "Michael, when did you first get butt-fucked?". I meekly replied, "My Great Dane Cosso fucked me first, then Bob". Greg replied, "oh so you also like stud dogs fucking you, I've got a big English Mastiff that would love to start fucking you, would you like that Michael?". Mumbling, I moaned out, "yes I want him to, what is his name?". Greg replies, "Jack, you suck dog cock as well Michael?". "yes" I cry out, when can I meet Jack?". Bob says, "Michael, how often will you be available for me!".
I thought for minute then said, "now that it is summer, most days between about 9am and 3pm, then 7pm to 9pm I can walk down to the Park Drive dairy and you could pick me up when you want me, both my parents work full time".
Greg, " it is Saturday today, how about, I'll pick you up at Park Drive later today about 4pm? if you want".
I tell Greg I'll be there.
Greg says, "Michael we all belong to a private group with quite few males and females and dogs that you can serve sexually, "beside letting Jack take you as his new bitch to stud would you be interested in meeting a couple of older black guys from the group that I know would like to start fucking you, one is 52 and the other is 50 years old, they'd be good to you and put you in the female role always, they both have huge cocks".
I replied, "yes I'd like that a lot", as I moaned and whimpered, how many guys in your group do you think will fuck me?.
Greg, "right now there a 82 males, from 12 years old to 65 years old, my guess is they would love you to suck their cocks and butt-fuck you both".
I reply, "then I want all 82 of them to start using me for sex, mumbling, I said "yes please, I only want treated like as though I'm a girl, please!, please call me sissyboy, femboy, anything that makes me feel like a girl".
Greg, "do you think your like a transsexual Michael?".
I mumbled, "I know I just want to be like a girl, not really sure what a transsexual is, sorry".
Greg replies, "there are some homosexuals that get a sex change surgery so they can have breasts and a vagina like a real girl, the dress like girls as well, that's a transsexual in a nut shell".
I reply, "yes I would like to be a transsexual then".
Greg says, "we will all definitely treat you as though your a girl, gently and with lots of sex".
I reply, "I want sex as often as possible, I love what your doing to me now, and please ejaculate in my mouth when your ready to, I love semen in my mouth, makes me feel so girl like".
Greg moans, "I am getting close to ejaculating".
David comes walking in to the living room and sits at he other end of the couch at watches just as Greg starts ejaculating in my mouth, and it's the first of me actually seeing Greg's cock, it is super long and thin though, I get all Greg's semen swallowed, then ask Greg how long his cock is, he tells me it is 9 inches long, then I turn and look at David.
David smiles and says, "hi I am David".
I'm somewhat embarrassed replied meekly, "I'm Michael".
I stand, then sit in the middle of the couch and say to David, "I'd be happy to suck your cock or you can slide your penis up inside my bottom, which ever you like".
David replies, "well, that's a tough choice, but you have a great bottom, I'd like to experience having my penis up inside your butt if that is ok".
I replied, "yes, I love to be butt-fucked", I then said to all of them, "Bob has only been using Vaseline or mineral oil when he lubes me up, and I use mineral oil to douche my bottom, hand lotion burns my bottom terrible".
All three of the guys reply, "that's what we will use then".
Bob says, "the Vaseline is there on the floor next to the coffee table, just make sure there is a towel under Michael when studding him is all".
David, "so how long has Bob been studding you Michael?".
I replied, " over a year and half now".
David, "so your pretty experienced now, you going to want us three guys studding you on a regular basis now?".
I reply, "I want to be able to, I'll do my best, how often do you'd think you'll be wanting to be with me?".
Greg giggles, "every day, I want you as often as possible".
I replied, "I want it as often as possible too!, most days all day I'll be free all summer."
Bob. "since summer break from school Michael has been coming over to my house at about 3:30".
James, "what you think if Greg, David, Steven and I come by at 4:30?".
Bob says it is fine with him whether he is home or not, door key is under the big rock by the bottom of the back steps.
I reply, "I mainly have to be home by 6pm for supper, or Mom will be mad and worried".
Greg, " if we double team you as we are doing now, we will make an hour work, I've got a few weeks vacation I could take, I could take you out to William's at Lake Bracken, I could pick you up at Bob's take you out for a whole day, Jake his English Mastiff would likely fuck you several times a day, Daniel has a English Mastiff named Vern, Vern and Jake get along good so Daniel could bring him out so Vern could fuck you as well".
I reply, "yes I'd really like to be getting bred by Vern and Jake and all your group dogs regularly, I love how Cosso wildly fucks me and locks me up to himself with his huge knot".
James, "Michael, maybe if ok with you we can introduce to some more guys we know, several have large intact male dogs".
I reply, "if you think they treat me good, sure, but I don't know if I will have the time to serve any more guys, but I want to see as many guys and dogs as possible".
James, "I'll see what I can do".
I reply, "in the evening this summer I can stay out until dark so 8-9 pm, if say you wanted to pick me up at Bob's and take me to William an/or Daniels, or I can give them blow-jobs as we drive around, as long as I am back home between 8pm to 9pm".
Greg, "I'll call William, but I know once he meets you Michael he is going want you as their full-time sissy-boy to fuck, and suck his cock".
I reply, "my friend Kevin is black and 12 years old now, he just started fucking me, so I like black guys".
David and Steven both say, "well maybe we will get stud dogs for you Michael!".
I smile big and say, "I'd love that".
At 4pm I was back over at Bob's house, David and Steven showed up at 4:30 with two younger guys, Eric and Bradley were 13 and 14 years old, I was ready so I got on my hands and knees, Eric got in front of me and stuck his cock in my mouth as Bradley started butt-fucking me, Eric was ejaculating in my mouth in about 10 minutes, not long after Bradley pulled out of my bottom, got around in front of me and ejaculated in my mouth as David started fucking me.
As soon as I'd got Bradley's cum swallowed then Steven stuck his cock in my mouth, Steven was ready to cum after about 10 minutes, so he came around in front and started ejaculating in my mouth as David then went behind me and started fucking me, Bob then stuck his cock in my mouth.
David fucked me for maybe 10 minutes then pulled out came around in front of me and ejaculated in my mouth as Bob switched to fucking me, soon then Eric stuck his cock in my mouth again, everybody but Bob ejaculated in my mouth twice, by then it was 5:30, Greg had called Bob and told me he'd pick me up at Bob's house at 7pm that evening.
I headed home.
I was at Bob's at 7pm, Greg was waiting for me, he told me that I had a date with William and Jake the English Mastiff, so we hopped in his car and headed to William's house.
Needless to say, I was super excited, it was only about a 10 minute drive to William's, his place is out at lake Bracken, as we walked to the backdoor of William's place, we could hear woof, woof!, "that's Vern", I replied, "I hope he wants me", Greg chuckled, and said, "I'm sure he will". as we got to the door, William opened it wearing his bath robe, he said come on in and let Vern welcome you Michael, me as well, we both have been eager to meet you.
William lead us to the living room, then he told us to take a seat, as soon as I was seated William stood in front of me opened his robe and said, "Michael this is what I have to offer you, hope you like". I just stared at his big black semi erect cock for a moment, looked up at William and said, "can I start sucking it?", William replied, let me sit, Michael you get on your knees in front of me, and maybe Jake will mount you, lets see what happens".
That's just what we did, as I licked, kissed and sucked William's semi-erect cock it quickly got fully erect.
William moaned and said, "that's a good sissy-boy, worship that big black cock, you need a black Master like don't you Michael?, you going be my sissy slut boy from now on?".
I mumbled, "yes, I need to belong to you, use me as you see fit please!".
Wiggle that cute little ass around, Jake is already looking very interested in studding you".
I started wiggling my bottom as Vern sniffed me, then started licking my bottom, then the next thing I know Vern's huge body is up on my back, then I feel the tip of Jake's penis poking trying to find my butt hole as he humps me vigorously, which he does rather quickly, as I feel his penis enter my bottom, then with each thrust it goes deeper up inside me as I whimper and try to keep sucking Williams cock.
William, "he is determined to get it stuck",
About as soon as William finishes saying that, I feel Jake's seemingly huge knot swells up inside me, I started squirming and loudly whimpering as Jake's knot and cock swell bigger and bigger inside me".
William, "that's a good boy, fill your new sissy-bitch's boy pussy with that hot dog cum"
I moan out, "he is, his cock is throbbing and hot in me!, oh Jake I wanta be your full time sissy-bitch so much".
William, "Michael now as he fills you with cum, get to sucking my cock, I want to see your mouth full of my cock, suck it you sissy-bitch!, then I'll shove it up you butt when Vern is done with you, your going start coming and seeing us daily Michael, that's what I expect you to be doing from now on, at least until school restarts".
I mumble as I say, "William what is your work schedule?".
William, "I'm retired from Air force, so I don't have a work schedule, so be at Bob's at 8:30 Monday thru. Friday and I pick you up and bring you back here, I've been at this awhile so I own 15 submissives, age 10 to 40 years old, you'll be be number 16#, you'll also be my only completely female roled receptive submissive, so all 15 of my submissives will take you as their submissive, so you'll be getting fucked by all of them, performing fellatio on all of them from now on.
Michael, tomorrow you'll be serving at least 10 of them likely, I can get all 15 here between 9am and 4:30 pm, then all of them can fuck you tomorrow, we see, but you'll be getting fucked and sucking cock all day, Monday thru Friday".
I reply meekly, "I want to do whatever you want me to do William".
William, "thats what I expect, do you have dress you can wear, I want you looking like girly-boy for everyone from now on, if not I get you some dresses or at least pay for them, but we can go shopping and you can pick out so dresses you like".
I reply, "I'd like that a lot".
William, "the 5 oldest of my submissives have English Mastiff stud dogs, they will all be fucking you regularly, along with Jake and Vern, then two of my submissives have English Mastiffs yet they will not be mature as stud dogs, I also have 6 female submissives that you'll be a submissive for, you'll be performing cunninglingus on them, and if the wish for you to butt fucking them when you hit puberty, or when you can get erect in order to fuck them, you'll do as they wish, so I plan on you being my submissive until I die or just plain to old".
I reply meekly, "you own me now, so I belong to you forever". (I was simply sure I wanted William that much).
William, "Michael do you have a douche bottle and latex dildo for use in cleaning your bottom to prepare for anally sex?".
I replied, "Bob gave me a douche bottle, I been using either mineral oil or vegetable oil in it, I douched before coming over tonight".
William, "let me get you a dildo, Stan one of my older subs makes really nice latex dildos for all my subs, be right back".
As William stands and walks away, Greg tells me to get on my knees and start sucking his cock, so I do".
Greg says, "Michael suck on those big balls for awhile".
I take one of Greg's balls completely in my mouth and gentle suck on it.
Greg, "Michael, your going be a great sissy sub for all us guys and dogs".
Jake starts pulling out of me, causing me let Greg's ball fall out of my mouth as I whimper and squeal as his big knot suddenly pops out of me".
I look up at Greg and mumble, "that felt like a huge knot!".
Greg, ' he does have huge knot, get down and lick and suck Jake's cock clean Michael".
I do as told.
I hear William say, "you belong to Jake now Michael, get that cock of his licked clean, then I want to feel my cock up in that tight young ass of your's".
In minutes William is getting me so I am laying my chest on the couch, then he slowly starts sliding his big black cock up inside me, I start squealing and squirming about as it slides deeper and deeper up inside me.
William, "oh Michael your so nice and tight, it feels wonderful, oh you going be a great sissy slut for me to fuck!".
I mumble, "oh you feel so good up inside me, please don't stop".
William fucked me nice and slowly for about 10 minutes, then said, "Michael I'm going go ahead and cum in your butt since your already full of Jake's cum".
William pulls me firmly onto his cock then starts huffing and puffing as he starts ejaculating up inside me.
As soon as William gets his cock pulled out of me, Greg is right there sliding his hard cock up inside me, I start squealing and squirming all over again.
Following week
William was retired, so William would pick me up at 8:30 am, bring me home at 4pm every day, his English Mastiff "Jake" started fucking me every day at least once, that week.
William made it very clear to me that he wanted me as his submissive and wanted him with him as much as possible
William was going to start arranging things for me,
Which of the group dogs that I be getting bred by as there were 34 large intact male stud dogs in the group.
I would be performing cunninglingus on all 34 of the female group members who owned the dogs.
7th grade
For me, once I'd gone through puberty, and sexually mature (masturbating and ejaculating) then the Gender Dysphoria was a everyday thing.
It really started out with boom!, you might say;
I was in 7th grade, age 12 a whole new school, larger and with many new students, 7 through 9 grades, plus a open shower policy for gym class, I was very nervous about the open shower policy that due the fact that I knew I was sexually attracted to guys, and the "not knowing how I would react" to seeing all these fellow male students nude.
There were also a lot black students in this new school, (which I like) where my middle school had just a few black students, there were many more black guys here at this new school.
My the first week there, I was sitting on the bench in front of my locker which was near the open showers, and I glanced into the showers and I could clearly see Rod, one black guys in my gym class showering, he had the biggest cock I'd ever seen, I was staring at him, I couldn't help myself from staring at it, well Rod caught me staring at him. As I still was sitting on the bench tying my shoes, Rod walked to me, stood in front of me, there 2 feet right in front of my face was Rod's huge semi-erect cock, I looked up at him and meekly said "hi".
Rod replied "you want to suck it don't you, I know a femboy when I see one".
Looking at his penis in front of me, I meekly replied, "it just is so big, I don't know", then I looked down embarrassed.
Rod replied, "you mean you don't know, why?".
I meekly replied, "I guess I just met you kinda thing, I guess is all".
Rod, "well you see what I have to offer, and I needing a femboy to start sucking it a regular basis".
Rod walked on down to his locker, I hurried and got dressed and headed to my next class.
Well later in the day while I was walking down the hall along with many other students headed to their next class, suddenly Rod came up behind me and whispered in my ear, "I want you to suck my big black cock, you know you want it", I just kept walking and didn't reply.
After that, in gym class he started asking me every day things like "have you sucked cock yet, if you haven't I'd be surprised because I know you want to suck cock, I can tell your a femboy", after several days of his bothering me, I replied, "yes I'm a femboy".
Rod replied, " so I was right, you have sucked cock haven't you?"
.
I meekly replied, " yes, been sucking cock regularly since I was about 8 years old".
Rod asked me, "have you had cock up inside your butt yet?".
I told him, "yes regularly since I was 8 years old, how long is your cock?".
Rod replied, " it is 10 inches long, I'll be nice and gentle to you, do you like to swallow cum, I do want you to start you sucking my cock regularly, I'm looking for steady girly-boyfriend, who likes sucking and getting butt-fucked often".
I replied meekly, "I do really want to suck your cock, swallow your cum and have your cock up in my bottom, I very much want and need to feel like a girl, be treated like a girl by guys".
Rod replied, "I'll treat you like a girl, you can suck my cock everyday if you want or more, if you ready to suck my cock, meet me in the woods behind the dairy at 4pm and you can suck it and I'll help you feel like a girl from now on".
Well after I got home from school at 3pm, all I knew was, I wanted to suck his cock so much, I got on my bike and rode down to the woods behind the dairy and sure enough Rod showed up, he rode to me on his bike, then he told me to follow him to a spot in the woods where I could safely suck his cock, once we got to the spot, he unzipped his shorts, pulled out his already huge erect cock and told me to get down and start sucking it, I eagerly did, in less than a minute he was ejaculating in mouth.
Rod very much had me under his spell, I was ready to do for him anything he wanted me to,after that day, he and I would meet at that same spot every day, I'd perform fellatio on him and swallow his cum, this went on about a week then he told me he had an older friend who would like to have me start sucking his cock as well, and he'd bring him to meet me tomorrow, by that time I was Rod's free-use submissive, I would have done almost anything for him, so I said ok.
Well, the next day, Rod showed up with Steve another black guy from school, they were waiting for me, thus I sucked both of them until they ejaculated in my mouth.
The following day another black guy from school was with Rod, this went on for a couple of weeks until I was sucking 4 different black guys from school, Rod told me he had many more older guys who don't attend our school yet they were good friends of both Rod and Steve's, they could start using me for sex if I wished.
Rod gives me an 18 inch long double-ended dildo, and a douche bottle.
Need for Affirmation
As a "former female-roled receptive male zoosexual"
I need to be wanted, valued and dominated sexually by my male stud dogs, jack donkeys and stallions helped me feel female.
Myself being 100% female-roled receptive, being "Gentially Avoidant", in that I don't wish to have a male partner that is interested in my penis), thus I can't be a partner for a homosexual male unless he only takes the "Top" role, I've never penetrated a male with my penis, I have no desire to be with females and I never allow another to perform fellatio on me. Thus being a female-role receptive zoosexual is ideal for me.
(I was a female-roled receptive zoosexual from 1970 to 2000)
A very important dynamic for me is needing to have partner/partners which I belong to where they belong to me mutually "like a marriage", as a zoosexual I was able to have that mutual type of commitment, "I was theirs, they were mine".
It is very important that my role be "free-use submissive/only female-roled sexually".
I very much need dominated sexually. (Objectified/animalistically)
I need to made to feel female like sexually, constant feminizing.
I needed treated like this from human males as well!
Gender identity disorder, often referred to as gender dysphoria, is a condition where a person's sex assigned at birth does not align with their gender identity. This incongruence can lead to significant psychological distress and may require various forms of gender affirmation, including medical treatments, social transitions, and legal changes.
Gender-affirming therapy is a therapeutic approach that focuses on affirming a patient's gender identity and does not attempt to 'repair' it. It aims to create a safe space for individuals to explore their gender identity and expression, addressing mental health challenges that may arise from living with gender dysphoria.
The importance of gender-affirming therapy lies in its ability to alleviate feelings of dysphoria and improve the overall quality of life and emotional well-being of LGBTQ+ individuals. It provides support and resources for those seeking to affirm their gender identity and expression, addressing the mental health challenges that can accompany it.
Myself being 100% female-roled receptive, being "Gentially Avoidant", in that I don't wish to have a male partner that is interested in my penis), thus I can't be a partner for a homosexual male unless he only takes the "Top" role, I've never penetrated a male with my penis, I have no desire to be with females and I never allow another to perform fellatio on me. Thus being a female-role receptive zoosexual is ideal for me.
(I was a female-roled receptive zoosexual from 1970 to 2000)
A very important dynamic for me is needing to have partner/partners which I belong to where they belong to me mutually "like a marriage", as a zoosexual I was able to have that mutual type of commitment, "I was theirs, they were mine".
It is very important that my role be "free-use submissive/only female-roled sexually".
With human males, I very much want to be told!, for example be driving somewhere
with a male lover, he his driving and he tells me to get his cock out and start sucking
it, another example is a male lover had just finished fucking me, he then told me that
he be bringing three young guys to my place, he wants to watch me give them all a
blow-job, if they want to fuck you, I want to let them. For me this makes me feel wanted
and important to him, and he gives me alot of sexually attention and treats me well.
I very much need dominated sexually. (Objectified/animalistically), I crave being
gang-banged!, at least by all the Jensen group guys because I know they are all STD safe.
I need to made to feel female like sexually, verbally,
Affirmation of my Role and my importance of belonging to my canine and equine partners
I very much needed attention as I was getting little at home
I think I needed some to show me the way, tell me what to do,
Edward and Cosso in essense showed me my role by taking me
as their female-roled partner.
Then dominating me sexually, in that once they had bred for the
first time, all times after they were more then eager to stud me.
The first time, each took a bit of coaxing
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Once Edward and Cosso had bred me it was the greatest Affirmation I could get, it was beyond wonderful knowing they wanted me sexually, I had partners that would be with me for life, and they were excited as I was.
At least I knew I was a "Wanta be or was going to end up being transsexual",
where to go from there I had no idea. Even today I so often fantasized/ wished that I could get the sex change surgery
I so much wish I didn't have a penis, and had a female like vagina
I so often fantasized/ wished that the dogs could get me pregnant
I so often fantasized/ wished that I could breast feed the puppies
I'd already been sucking my jack donkeys penis by May 1970, I then started sucking my Great Dane Cosso's penis in June, Cosso started studding me June 1974 and successfully got me locked up in a copulatory-tie, thus fully copulating with me, we were locked up about 20 minutes after Cosso had studded me that first time he was very eager to stud me daily, which he often did.
Cosso studs me for the first time, June 1974
After about 30-40 seconds of Cosso holding me firmly and thrusting hard into me Cosso made that last hard thrust into and he big knot quickly swelled, so overwhelming knowing Cosso's big penis was stuck tightly up inside my body. It was something that I knew I could change, no way did I want my life to be any thing else now, knowing he wanted as his mating partner, I so much wanted to submit to him sexually. I remember thinking if only he could really get me pregnant, how wonderful that would be. I think this was the first time I knew I wanted to be a girl, and I for sure was a transsexual type person.
I know I was the first being that Cosso had ever bred, so both of us were new to this, he tried pulling out of me a bit early, yet when he realized his penis was very tightly locked up inside of me, I easily got him calmed down.
At the time Cosso was just a bit over two years old, he was never fixed, so he was intact, and once I started sucking his penis, he was eager that I do it often, yet once he'd studded me and got me locked in a copulatory-tie, he "OWNED ME!", and if he wanted sex he let me know, and it was summer break from school, so it was Cosso and I alone at home all day 5 days a week. I wanted Cosso to want me!, being locked in a copulatory-tie was the most wonderful experience I'd ever known, Cosso made me feel so wanted and important for him, so if he wanted me, I clean my bottom and offer him my bottom anytime he wanted me as long as we were alone at home, some days he stud me twice, then two days later he might stud me once, it pretty much stayed as that until he was about 6 years old then he really slowed down.
Just feeling Cosso throbbing penis ejaculating up inside of me as we lay there on the floor locked super tightly in a copulatory-tie was completely overwhelming to me, here was my best buddy in the world, and now he has takened me as his girl friend to copulate with. I simply knew he owned me!, he was like my Master now!, there
was no way I could stop having sex with him now.
Soon after Cosso was studding me, my jack donkey Edward was studding me as well
By age 18 years old, I knew I should have been born a girl and so much wanted to be a girl
Then I heard the news of Caroline Cossey
(born 31 August 1954[2]), also known as Tula, is a British model, actress, activist, and author. She appeared in the 1981 James Bond film For Your Eyes Only as an extra. Following her appearance in the film, she was outed as transgender by British tabloid News of the World. In 1991, she became the first trans woman to pose for Playboy.[3] Cossey has since then fought for her right to legally marry and be legally recognized as a woman.
The following is of the issue of Playboy that Caroline Cossey appeared in
IMDb site for "Your Eyes Only
